Have your family and friends ever told you how lucky you are to have a job (your job, to be precise), but all you feel is a sense of utter confusion? Perhaps you simply can’t put your finger on what exactly it is that you don’t like about your current role, and you’re still there because of that, especially since people keep telling you how happy you should be and how grateful you should feel for having been offered a job.
If this is you, fret not. According to The Muse, this could be a case of unidentified career values. What are career values? Well, this is what it’s all about:
Career values go beyond the actual work you do—they’re more about what you get out of that work. You might be super interested in what you do and exceptionally skilled at it, but if you need, say, a high level of independence in order to feel satisfied in your work, then the company and manager you work for matters just as much as figuring out what position you’d like to hold.
You can read on about clarifying your career values at www.themuse.com because right now, what I’m going to touch on have more than just to do with career values. And yours truly is going down this wretched path now.
Today’s post is actually an update to my previous one about whether companies should have employee counselling services. I was unable to find any such services in my company so I just did the first and only thing that came to mind — having a short discussion with the Human Resources department head. After all, if there should be any advice coming from the company, it’s best to seek some out from this person. Thankfully, she was able to help me out here. But not without the usual consequences.
Wondering whether your job fits you or not is the most difficult dilemma to solve. Because you can never know what the job feels like until you have accepted the offer and climbed onboard. You won’t know how seriously messed up it is until you start doing some work for them. You definitely can’t tell if it’s what you’ve been looking for until you’ve stayed there long enough. But are you going to wait and how long are you willing to wait for an answer?
One day, I realised that I was just merely hanging on. By a thread. I was clinging to work that I didn’t enjoy. I was grasping onto a position that didn’t fit me. I was lingering in an environment that wasn’t healthy. And I was sticking with something that was draining all of my energy.
If I had to be completely honest with myself, I would have thought that I’d known this when I accepted the position that I was heading to a job that was not a good fit for me. I knew that too, even while I was going through the entire interview process. Some of the tasks were very, very deadline-oriented, which was not my forte. I knew that. I realised that I had only accepted the job because I thought it would be good experience for me to get my hands dirty and have it on my resume.
Boy, I was so wrong!
Nozomi Morgan had a lot to say about this on Huffington Post. To whom I entirely agree with.Especially on this subject matter.
So what went wrong in that short period of time? Well, I learnt a few things despite the short stint. I learnt that I was being discouraged from being myself. Having to be one person at home and an entirely different person at work is simply too taxing. The culture isn’t exactly amazing either. It makes me a little uncomfortable. Too much cussing and way too many deadlines with little to no breathing space at all. Not to mention, the ol’ bait-and-switch trick where the actual job was a different from what was described. Imagine starting out energetic in the morning but I’m all drained out and squeezed dry by the time lunch rolls round.
I dread Mondays. I watch the clock tick all day. And I can’t wait for Fridays.
I felt disconnected, as if the rest of the company is going in one direction really fast and I’m either heading down the wrong direction or going the same direction but at a really slow pace. I haven’t been able to deliver any of the deadlines that has been given to me. And because I’m such a dedicated person, the moment I fail to deliver, I start blaming myself for my failure and faults. I’ve become a totally different person. I’m depressed. I’m demotivated. I’m demoralised. I’ve lost sleep on some nights. I sometimes prefer not to eat because I’ve lost my appetite. And I’ve been having headaches that never seem to go away.
So if you feel dreadfully uncomfortable in your current position and it’s very unlikely that you’ll stay on to find out what happens next, then I’d suggest you find an escape route. Do it properly. Don’t burn bridges on your way out. Thank them for the opportunity but make sure that whatever it is that you find next will be something that you want and not another stepping stone to another job. And that’s probably what I’d do too.